Tough day

A few days ago we started our kids in a local Charter School to give me a chance to regain some of my energy and health that I've lost since we have been home schooling. We knew this would be a challenge for the kids but mostly for Joe. Dave and I really felt that he needed a completely structured environment to help him through some of his problems and this school seemed like the best place for him to get that.

Well, today Joe and Isaac had their yearly check-ups at the doctor. We discussed several things that we need to do to help Joe with his Asperger's and different ways we could accomplish these. It was a bit overwhelming knowing how much I still need to do to help my little boy. I then went and dropped him and Isaac off at school and went about my day.

I know it's been hard for him to adjust to school but so far he says he loves it their. His teacher is really sweet and is also a very experienced teacher. She works really hard to make sure Joe understands what is going on and to teach him the routine. We have still had a lot of problems though, he tells her he won't do things and climbs over the desks. He runs off whenever he wants to and tends to ignore her when she's teaching. Well, this evening I got an email from his teacher that said that during recess he slapped a little girl for no reason. When he was asked why he simply stated that he wanted to. He admitted she had done nothing wrong he just wanted to do it.

I am beginning to think that this school is not going to work for him after all. I always knew I might have to pull him out of this school but I was hoping a regular routine would help. He acts like an almost normal kid at home but that's because I've taught him everything he has to do to socialize at home. In the outside world he doesn't understand that hitting strangers isn't okay. I know that may seem strange but he really doesn't know that. I think many would think that is why he needs to be in school but I disagree. It's hard because to much stimulation and information tends to shut kids like this down. They become overwhelmed and lose all confidence in themselves and there ability to control themselves.

I have to admit I'm mourning my child today. I love him for who he is and always will but I can't help but worry about the future. The amount of things I need to teach him are stagering and it's impossible for me to know all the things that he still doesn't know. It's also heartbreaking to discipline a child who really didn't know what he was doing was wrong and to watch him lose all chances of making friends at this new school. I wish so much that he could just understand why what he did was wrong but I know he can't and that is the most heart breaking of all.

So tonight I'll talk with him. We'll role play the situation over and over again so he can know what to do when he's in that situation again. I'll also instruct him some more on how to treat his teacher, his classmates, and school property....in that order. We'll then discuss proper recess behavior and finally how to apologize when you've done something wrong. Tomorrow I'll send him to school reciting the added social rules he's just learned and then hope and pray that it's a better day then today.